as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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