Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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