Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
