Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize
