do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Who died my cat blue again?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize