Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
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