ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
