I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
