its not stalking. its research.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize