sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
handjob tips. give me some.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
