Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
