He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
