left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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