how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Randomize