i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Randomize
