i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
