HIV tests are more positive than that guy
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
She made me pour olive oil on her.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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