my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize