Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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