you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Randomize