Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
