just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize