Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize