i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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