I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
