Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
