Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize