Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize
