Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I just want to make out with him forever
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Randomize
