The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
