sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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