so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize