We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Randomize
