oh god the rape fog is back!
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
