More tranny stories later!
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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