Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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