I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
