She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize