Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
So. Much. Porn.
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