Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Randomize
