everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
