My room smells like vodka and shame
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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