yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
