you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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