I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
