His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
