Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
