I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
farters have to be the big spoon...
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
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