I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Randomize
