her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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